Gratitude and growing pains

Hi there,

Haven’t written here in a while and I must say, I thank every one of you who’s read my stuff and found it helpful or have been super supportive throughout my journey.

It’s been about two months since school started, and it’s almost 2018 — where does the time go? I have to say that whoever told us that anesthesia school was no joke.. was not lying.

This is the most stressed I’ve ever been in my whole, entire, life. And, I have been put to test a few times in my life and nothing comes close to this. I hate to admit it because admitting something is hard is a sign of weakness, right? No. I have come to realize that I am a very emotional person and I do cry sometimes… actually, I cry a lot and mostly because I lose control over a situation. Whether it be in the middle of a sentence when I’m talking about something or at home by myself. And, I hear it’s healthy. It’s my coping mechanism, and for those of you coping like I am right now, just know that you are not alone.

It’s normal to feel stressed, and depressed. And there is help out there. One thing I’ve learned this year is that mental health is just as important as every other disease, like hypertension or diabetes. With depression or high stress, your body will start to maladapt and can’t really function anymore and you will start getting sick and not want to do fun things or do anything at all… (shout to my patho professor Sally for making such a dry topic so passionately fun)

It will happen but to quote a classmate “nothing worth it comes easy” as we are being challenged to being the best version of ourselves. I would rather cry now than cry in the middle of a case while I have someone’s life in my hand – going through one of the toughest times in their lives, a surgery that was unexpected, and I’m the one making sure their anxieties are alleviated, and that I figure out the best concoction for them to not feel any pain in the safest and best way possible. That one day, I will have a family and I can tell them I too, went through what you’re going through. And you just have to trust the process. That these are just growing pains.


Again to quote Sally: “Stress response is meant to be short lived followed by respite.”

Understanding stress – this is normal.

Encountering stress on a regular basis, benefits us.

  • Healthy stressors: they make us healthier, smarter, stronger. For example:
    • Demanding mental activities: uncomfortable learning. So, pick up that hobby that you always wanted to do and keep at it! It’s meant to be uncomfortable. You can’t actually be learning anything if you are already comfortable with everything.
    • Demanding physical activities: the benefits of exercise is undeniable.
      • I recently tried out this boxing class called Rumble, it incorporates boxing and strength training all in one jam packed hour, and it is unbelievably hard but you feel SO good right after. Oh, it feels GREAT not being out of breath when I climb stairs, or be able to squat properly with good form 😉


  • Overwhelming stress, however, can be detrimental.
    • Cold stress, altitude stress (lower oxygen allows them to adapt and increase RBC count- increase oxygen capacity and help run more since more oxygen pumped to muscles)

Stress response

Stress in an individualized response. Certain circumstances vary for each person. Good support at home, and available support system.

1.Adaptive stress response – when a person goes thru their last straw but have a good support system at home.

2.Maladaptive stress- when a person goes thru their last straw and copes with alcohol or drugs.


So, to wrap it all up I think the lesson is – you’re not alone. And, this is a lesson to myself. There are always people who want to listen to you and in my case, I have more than handful of people that love me, friends and even acquaintances that are willing to lend an ear. I appreciate you. Stress can be detrimental, or it could make us stronger, I guess at the end of the day you get to choose. Find a healthy balance and keep the hustle. After all, they don’t call us the greatest city in the world or the city that never sleeps for no reason – just have to be aware of your own behaviors and seek the help you may need and keep moving forward.


Thats all,




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